It took me nearly a year to realise some truth, I just realised it yesterday! Realising more about lying by omission and lying in general because of thinking that it is kinder to that person to do so. Realising how much I have lied in my life, thinking I was being loving. I have just done it to protect myself from feelings of being rejected, not wanting to see what unloving things I have done to others to protect myself, harming them, a desire to hurt others to protect myself. The realisation that when I am lied to how unloving it feels, how I feel about that person when I am lied to, that the relationship that I thought we had, was not real, it was a facade, that this similar to how another person feels when I have lied to them. But what caused me to do that? I have hurt another person with the Truth Too, rather than having a loving intention, what would cause me to do that?
No wonder my eyesight has not been good, I haven't wanted to see the truth either. Judging truth as hurtful, staying in the pretence that I can do no wrong, wanting to be seen as a "good" person. Not wanting to see how fake I have been.
I realised how easily I can be manipulated by spirits in that moment of being unsure if I can trust my own intuition, that I don't even notice that I omit what I intuitively felt was the truth, and slipped so effortlessly and unconsciously into addictive behaviour to get approoval from that person, and avoid all of the feelings there........getting closer to the cause.! Back to not wanting to be rejected, to those times that I lied, what was I avoiding feeling?
Ok , I'm just avoiding
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